Do you ever have those days that you've dreaded for so long? Those days that you know you have to go through but you can't figure out if the going through is the worst or best part of the day? I had one today that I've been dreading for weeks. I have been loosing sleep, dreaming...no, having nightmares about today. Early last Saturday morning I woke up in the middle of one of those dreams and it wasn't so bad...the moment I realized what I was "doing" in the dream, what I "controlled" then it all become so much more bearable to me. I got up and wrote out what I needed to remember from the dream (by the way, I highly recommend that, you can learn so much about yourself). I typed for about a hour, re-read it, and put it away until this morning. I did some final editing and the thing I was so full of angst about, wasn't so bad. My thinking had made it more than it was. I exhausted myself and no one (ok, my partner and my good friend were probably tired of hearing me obsess and it might have been painful to watch me NOT let this thing go) else was effected...not those that I feared, not bystanders, just me. What a waste of energy. Note to self: Lesson learned...remember it....nothing is as bad as I make it out to be. Let it go....let it be!
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